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January 24, 2013
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Cease with making promises that you cannot ever keep—
can you not see this loathing becoming even more deep?
Halt in your useless words of comfort, telling me everything will be okay—
how can you say such things so simply, when you are never here day by day?
Refrain from acting as if you can turn my world from bleak to bright—
when was the last time you truly changed every wrong thing to right?

It was such a simple pleasure, back in those days;
just one word from you made gold from the grays.
A luxury it was, I now see that more clear than glass;
for those times are done and gone, having long since passed.
Indulgence was my sin whenever thoughts of you jolted through my brain;
it is a laughing matter at how correspondence with you now causes me pain.

You say you want to help me, you say nothing will ever be my fault...
but is that true, when you regret my slow change from child to adult?
You know I tried my damnedest to continue being your best friend...
but what is truly going on in your head, now that it may be coming to an end?
You begged for me to understand and nourish you while it felt like it was running me up a tree...
but now that the roles of adviser and ward have altered so drastically, can you do the same for me?
Sorry, guys. I'm venting again. About very personal stuff. That I would prefer not to delve into. I know the person this is meant for will never read this, but...

It's pathetic how much you distracted me back when I thought nothing of the world except making sure you were going to be all right every fucking day. Now that I'm the one in your shoes, you keep saying you'll do your best to do the same, but...

We both know it's not doing shit for me, and you're never going to keep your promises. You're never going to put me back together again like you want to so desperately.

I want to say I hate you...

But you're one of the best friends I've ever had, and my heart and brain just can't take the war inside of me.
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:iconlilredbird101:
LilRedBird101 Featured By Owner Jan 27, 2013   General Artist
You are not alone, so many of us here can relate to this.
For me it more of the growing up and apart from a girl I considered my best friend and biggest support all through my primary years. It rips me in two like an old rag, but I've got so many new (And in many cases better) friends now that I simply don't care as much any more.
I'm really sorry these things are happening to you, its never nice. I hope it gets better. *Hugs*
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:iconimagination-junkie:
imagination-junkie Featured By Owner Jan 24, 2013
Definitely can relate to that. All to well.

Good job with the rhyming.
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:iconprussianpersephone:
PrussianPersephone Featured By Owner Jan 24, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Yeah...sad, isn't it?

Thanks. It feels a bit...forced, in my opinion.
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:icondompteurloup:
DompteurLoup Featured By Owner Jan 25, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
It does sound a bit forced, but the ability to find the proper words to express your situation makes up for it. What you said here, is something similar to where I find myself. However, I can't find words to give how it feels the proper.. respect, the right voice you have given it.
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:iconcrazycharlette1415:
CrazyCharlette1415 Featured By Owner Jan 24, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Lots of us know this feeling... I can't do anything to help you but just give you an online hug. :hug:
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:iconprussianpersephone:
PrussianPersephone Featured By Owner Jan 24, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
It's the thought that counts.
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:iconcrazycharlette1415:
CrazyCharlette1415 Featured By Owner Jan 24, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Indeed.
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:iconvlonev:
VLoneV Featured By Owner Jan 24, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Your words speak so true. I can relate to this completely
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:iconprussianpersephone:
PrussianPersephone Featured By Owner Jan 24, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you very much.
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:iconvlonev:
VLoneV Featured By Owner Jan 24, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
You're very welcome!!
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