More specifically Jack Frost? Because it's been awhile and right now, I'm needing it more and more in my life.
This movie means so much to me. Jack means so much to me. When Rise of the Guardians came out, I was at one of the lowest points in my life; everything was really fucking bad and I was really, really fucking dark. But on one November evening in 2012 when the opening scene unfolded in front of my eyes, everything changed. For one hour and thirty seven minutes I forgot about everything. My depression, my suicidal urges, my bulimia...I was completely and utterly entranced by Jack Frost and the other Guardians.
College hasn't been good to me honestly. It's been making me stressed beyond all compare and considering the fact I work a lot right after school, I don't have much time anymore. As soon as RotG was available on DVD it's been my go-to medicine whenever I can feel myself getting low. So for the past month or so, well...every week I've been watching it at least once to let myself relax and ignore my anxieties and sadness.
Watching the movie so much for the last couple of weeks is making me remember just how much I love Jack. He is my guardian in my mind. For 300 years he was invisible and without a purpose; most of my life, I've felt that way. But by the end of the movie he grows into this amazing, confident being who just wants to make those close to him happy.
Jack Frost has saved me. I don't care if he's just a fictional character. If I get the urge to do something harmful and the thought of my friends and family doesn't stop it, it's often thinking how Jack Frost would react that ceases everything. I haven't forced myself to throw up in over a year because of him. I haven't seriously planned out killing myself because I know it's something he wouldn't approve of.
The entire movie is magical. It gives me hope. It lets me enjoy the wonders of being a child again. It puts so much joy and happiness in my heart that all of my darkness fades away for a little bit.
But it's Jack Frost who truly keeps me going.
I just...I love him. I love him with every fiber of my being. It's not just some silly fangirlish romance like it was at first. But now it's grown, morphed into something...else. It's love. I don't know how else to explain it. He isn't merely a character to me. He's my conscience. My friend. My guardian.
It's stupid. I know. But I guess I just felt the need to share it. Things have been really hard for me lately. Honestly, without Jack, they'd be worse.